We are so quick to judge if someone is successful or not. We take a look at the job they’re having, the clothes they’re wearing, the house they’re living in or the car they’re driving. Having a high-performance job, wealth, big things, and being busy. It’s all a sign of success. But is this truly what success looks like?
I personally, really believe it’s dangerous to keep up this ‘definition’ of success or portraying this image of what it looks like to be successful. The danger lies in the fact that this vision overrules all other definitions of success. This means that everyone is striving to achieve this and if they don’t live up to this expectation of what success is by society, they beat themselves up. They think they are unsuccessful, not good enough, unworthy and they will feel ashamed of not reaching that level of success. I think we have to stray away from believing that being successful equals having a lot of money or having a high performing job. It can be, for some people, but it’s totally ok if this is not for you.
Therefore, I think it’s really important to connect with yourself, to look inwards and not outwards. To ask yourself:
“What does success mean to me?”
“What does success look like to me?”
“When will I feel fulfilled?”
Once you’ve answered these questions, write down your ‘definition of success’. And when you’ve written down your definition, put it somewhere you will see it every day.
By establishing clearly what you define as success, you will start making decisions that support your vision. It will help you see the things you are doing and are working on, instead of seeing all that you’re not doing or don’t have. It helps you take charge of your life and it will make you feel good about yourself. It allows you to follow your own time-line.
And remember, success can look like a lot of things, it might differ from day to day and it’s certainly different for everyone!
I would love to hear your thoughts about this and would love it if you would share your definition of success with me.
This is my definition:
“Success to me is the ability to be free in designing my days, and therefore my life, in accordance with my values and the ability to go wherever I want to, alone and together with my partner. Success is feeling good about the big AND small decisions I make on a daily basis, even though they might be hard or scary. Success is trying new things, things I’ve never done before, but my heart is longing for. When my heart is pounding and I get a tingly feeling of excitement and aliveness, I just know, it’s worth it. But most of all success to me is spreading kindness and helping others.”